Still Becoming- 03.10.2024

Cheri shares deliberately learning to trust in Him
#stillbecoming
#itsaprocess
#seekhimwithallyourheart

#cherigarrett

Disappointment Comes

Disappointment comes in everyone’s life and usually in every area, multiple times.  And with it can come hopelessness and we many times lose our joy and energy for life.  At times seasons of disappointment are long and exhausting and we just want to give up.  Is this just me or do you struggle with seasons of disappointment?

We find ourselves disappointed in our jobs, and our churches, and our families, and our children, and our marriages.  We even find ourselves disappointed in God at times.  Now if you are one of those highly spiritual people that can’t handle that statement I’m sorry…but this is raw honesty.

I have found myself disappointed in God.  Why?  Because He didn’t do things the way I thought He should.  There, I said it!  I have thought of this song often in my times of disappointment and sang it to the top of my lungs with tears streaming, ” I thought by now You would have come down and washed my tears away, stepped in and saved the day.But once again I say Amen and it’s still raining.”

I stood on His Word.  I confessed His Word.  I confessed my sins.  I did my best to pursue Him.  In all this the circumstances remained the same.  And I struggled not to be disappointed.

It is easy when things are going great and we are blessed and prospering to read Job’s life story and think we could say like Job, “Yet if He slay me, still I will trust Him”.  It is a totally different story when we are going through hell.  And in this hell we live in a cushy, bless me Christian world where no one believes that God doesn’t let us live in a rose garden with no thorns all the time.  Where you learn that those you thought were friends couldn’t  hang on and walk with you through the tough times … just like Job’s friends.  We have experienced the kind of friends that Job had and you have too. They only want to hang when heaven is open and God’s blessings are chasing you down.  We’ve also learned that friendships are proven through time and that what you say is worth nothing if not followed by what you do.  If we’ve learned anything I hope it is to be the kind of friend that will walk through heaven and hell on earth with others!

I find myself exhausted in the midst of struggles.  And I’m wondering where God is in the midst of all this!  Yet, I still have hope.  I still have dreams and visions of things I believe God wants us to do. But I feel stuck at times in Job’s world.  And then God reminds me that this is a journey … a process of redemption and completion.  And none of it catches God by surprise.  That He is at work in our lives.

And even as I am completing this God reminded that He is working out His purposes and plans in and through our lives.  And that includes valleys and trials and injustice and pain.  He is working out HIS plans.  We still have some big dreams to equip, encourage and restore pastors and leaders here and abroad.  Dreams to knit Oasis (the untraditional church we pastor) into the very fabric of our community as influencers.  Dreams to bring healing and wholeness to the hurt and wounded.  Dreams to put coffee shops in communities as a safe place for the community and a place of life and relationships that effects change.

I realize again how large the vision is … Much bigger than the two of us.  It is a God  sized vision and will only be realized as He makes it happen.  We are His submitted vessels.  So I know that everything in our lives to this point has been preparing us for this moment in time … whatever that ends of looking like is up to God.   We submit our dreams to Him … to His vision and His plan.

And  in it all these are the things I KNOW:

I KNOW He loves me with an unfailing love that endures forever

I KNOW Whom I believe in and He is able

I KNOW that He is utterly trustworthy

I KNOW He has my best interest at heart

I KNOW that His ways are higher than my ways

I KNOW that His plans for me are good

I KNOW in Him I have a future and a hope

I KNOW in Him I am an overcomer

I KNOW He is completing me and He never gives up on me

I KNOW He is jealous for me

So, I choose each day and EVERY day…

To trust Him

To strive toward contentment

To love Him

To forgive

To live forgiven

To pursue Him

To love my husband and children and grandchildren

To humble myself

To live grateful

To NEVER give up

To pursue His purposes and plans…HIS vision.

And I KNOW He’s still working on me, to make me what I ought to be.  It took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars, the sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars.  How LOVING and PATIENT He must be.  Because He is STILL working on me.

“For I know the one in whom I trust, and I am sure that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him[a]until the day of his return.” 2 Timothy 1:12b

Trusting in the God I KNOW…

God … You Choose

This journey to know God more … to love Him with all my heart and soul and mind and strength … to submit to His completion process … to be a woman after His heart is not what I thought it would be.  It is a lot harder.  There are times it is filled with pain and uncertainty.  And God continues to remind me that everything He brings into my life or allows to touch me is a part of His journey for me … and His ultimate goal is to redeem me.

He reminds me of this again … and again … and again.  I submit to Him knowing that He knows best … even when I can’t see it and I don’t understand it.  Some days this is extremely hard and some days it is easier.  I have to keep choosing to submit to His journey for me.

I choose to trust Him.  It is a choice.  I choose to walk by faith and not by sight.  This too is harder than it sounds in church.  I read this quote by Oswald Chambers today in my time with God…

“God allows you to get into a place where your own welfare would be the right and proper thing to consider if you were not living a life of faith;  but if you are, you will joyfully waive your right and leave God to choose for you.”

I can make choices that seem like good and wise choices by what I see and understand … looking out for my own welfare.  But I want to choose to live by faith … not by sight.  By sight is so much easier but what we see is temporary and many times the glitter is on the outside of something dead.

Think about Lot.  He chose what looked like the best land …. fertile and well watered.  But hidden behind the beauty and provision of the land was wickedness and perversion.  I don’t know if you have ever made a decision by what you see and then find something totally different on the other side of the decision.  I have and there are always consequences.

My decision for today and with God’s help every day for the rest of my life is to waive my right to choose by what I see and leave God to choose for me.  To choose His journey.  And I do this with joy because I trust Him.

Lord, I submit to You … to Your journey … to Your plan.  You choose.  I will walk by faith … not by sight.

This is a choice I must make daily.   Are you living by what you see … Or by faith?

Choosing His Process…

Choices … that is what this journey to His heart is all about.  Each day we choose.  And the outcome of our journey depends on our daily choices.

We want to be closer to God’s heart.  We want to grow in Him.  We want our lives to please Him.  We want to be used by Him.  But many times we want to control the journey … to choose the route … for God to follow our way instead of us following His way.   In this journey to His heart we much choose to trust Him and to trust the process He chooses for us on the journey.   Even when it makes NO sense to us!  Look at what Jesus says…

“Then he told them what they could expect for themselves: “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat—I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?” Luke 9:23-25 MSG

Each day we must choose to let God lead … to keep Him in the driver’s seat.  It won’t look like we think it should most of the time but as we follow Him in this journey to His heart we will find our true, real selves … the person He sees in us right now, the person He is processing.

Trusting God and His process in my journey today!  How about you?

He gives … He takes away …

No matter what comes or what goes … I WILL hope in Him!

I’ve thought a lot about the Biblical character Job lately and all that was taken from him. His life experience doesn’t really fit in our “Christian” thoughts today of being blessed and protected and favored. 

God allowed Job to be tested by the enemy. He was tested through loss, sickness, disease, and ill-comforting friends. He lost his children. His wife turned on him and on God. His friends were far from loving and supporting. He lost all he had. Yet, Job stayed true to God. Job 13:15 is one of those amazing life challenging scriptures… “Though He slay me, I will hope in Him …” (NAS).

I WILL hope in Him!

Almost 31 years ago I was tested. Our beautiful five-month old little girl, Amber Hope, woke one morning not acting herself and quickly became very sick. We ended up in the Emergency Room with her that evening. We started hearing words like meningitis and other life-threatening illnesses.When our pediatrician arrived she quickly diagnosed her with intussusception.

Intussusception occurs when one portion of the bowel slides into the next, much like the pieces of a telescope. When this occurs, it can create a blockage in the bowel, with the walls of the intestines pressing against one another. This, in turn leads to swelling, inflammation, and decreased blood flow to the part of the intestines involved. Complications can include irreversible tissue damage, perforation of the bowel, infection, and death.

Our pediatrician immediately called in a pediatric surgeon. After examination, he informed us that Amber was extremely weak but needed surgery right away. He said that she might be too weak for surgery but without it she definitely would not live. We were also told that if she made it, she would very likely have at least a partial colostomy.

And I remember them rolling my baby away, the door closing separating her from me and I didn’t know if she would make it back out alive.

Jim and I were put in a room alone to wait to hear from the surgeon. It seemed like forever. We made a few calls for people to pray. Then we prayed and waited … and prayed and waited.

As I prayed, the Lord asked me this question … “If your baby dies will you still love me? Will you still trust me? Will you still serve me?” I didn’t realize it at the moment but I was in a heart-wrenching time of testing. If God didn’t step in and end this the way I wanted it to end, would I still love Him? Would I still trust Him? In the midst of the pain and the possibility of losing what was most precious to me, I finally came to the conclusion .. .and it was a heart searching decision … as I talked this out with God.

Yes, Lord. Whatever the outcome I will still love You, I will still trust You. I have no where else to run but to You. With that decision came peace even though we still waited to hear from the surgeon.

Our Amber Hope

If you know our family at all you know that we still have our Amber Hope. The outcome of her surgery was a miracle.

For the past 16 months I have faced maybe the hardest of all tests … definitely the longest. Can I say that even if all I have is taken from me I will STILL hope in Him? Or will I question Him? Will I question His love? Will I throw in the towel?

To hope in Him amidst trials and loss is a choice! It is a choice of faith. It is a choice to put my hope and faith in His trustworthiness … in His character. Trusting His promise to work it all together for my good and His purpose.

So, I choose to trust Him even when I don’t understand … even in loss … even in pain … even when the pain comes from those who are called to stand with you and care for you. I choose to love Him and serve Him with all I am and with all I have. I choose to stay in this completion process and finish strong!

“The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” Job 1:21

I WILL hope in Him!

Cheri

I Passed The Test!

I passed!  It wasn’t an easy test … And I did some repeats over the past few months … And finally I PASSED!  What an amazing feeling!  It wasn’t a test on paper.  I didn’t get a grade in the mail.  But I knew the moment I passed!  And that moment was a moment of humility and thankfulness!  What did I pass you ask?  Well that is a story … A story of wrongs done, pain inflicted, a time of woundedness.  It is my story.  Come along with me … on my journey.

In the Fall of 2011 we were informed that at the end of the year we would no longer be needed in our positions with never any clear reason given.  We both worked for the same employer…So that meant we were both unemployed.  It was a non-profit so that meant no unemployment benefits.  We had made the move from Toledo, Ohio to Chicago, IL in August of 2009.  We weren’t looking to make a move.  We both had good, secure jobs where we were greatly loved.  We were situated in a great location to all of our children.  We were pastoring a small church and my husband was a professor for a seminary.  We REALLY felt this move was a God move to a position He created for us.  We sold our home, we gave away our horses, we left our jobs … To follow the dream.

Sometimes following dreams end up much different than we anticipate … As this one did.

At the end of last year we found ourselves unemployed and facing a world that has been unfriendly to people our age.  The dream seemed to be crushed.  We were wounded, confused, lost…

One thing I can say is that God never left our side over this past year.  He has been faithful.  He has been Jehovah Jireh.  He has given us the power to forgive.

As the Thanksgiving season approached I found myself thinking of all the people and events and things I have to be grateful for (so,so much to be thankful for) and what I could share during this season of thanks.  And the thing spilled out that so surprised me was when I realized that I was actually thankful for the closed doors.

Thankful for closed doors … Sounds kinda crazy, huh?  See the door closed to the very reason we believed we were sent to Chicago … The door closed to a regular income … The door closed to multiple places we tried to go.  And I realized that I had passed the test when I came to the place where I was truly thankful for those closed doors.

By being thankful for closed doors I was trusting that God was controlling my life and I was trusting in His good plan for me.  Knowing that the world and the church may think I’m too old … But knowing God  has been seasoning me for such a time as this.  I found myself thankful for the closed doors.

Thankful because closed doors means there will be open doors.  Thankful because the closed doors gave us new insight into the dream.  Thankful for the growth I’ve experienced because of the closed doors.  Thankful for the people He has connected us with on the other side of the closed doors.  Thankful for His provision while the doors were closed.  Thankful for God words and God encounters during our time of closed doors.  Thankful for where we find ourselves today and where we are headed (what we can see and what we can’t see).

So, yes, I am very thankful for closed doors … Grateful…so VERY grateful that I finally passed the test… I am a richer and better person because of all that I’ve journeyed through over the past year of closed doors.

I’ve felt much like Joseph over these months…And I’m believing that like Joseph that all that has transpired has been preparation for where He is taking us and what He knows and has planned.  One of the words we received was “Converge”.  That everything we have done and experienced up to this point are converging to catapult us into the most significant phase of our ministry.  And that God is bringing others with all of their experiences who will also converge with Oasis.  Oasis will go forth to the north, south, east and west … To every continent.

So now I look with much excitement and anticipation to what God has called us to and for the people He is calling to join the vision.  I would have NEVER seen us here … BUT God.  He has called us to be His Oasis in the world.  It has been amazing as He has confirmed it over and over again.

So we press on with the dream and the vision.  It is much more than we thought. A dream to empower God’s people to BE His Church … To BE His Oasis in our community … in the world.  Strong people … Strong families … Strong Communities effecting change in our world.

Thank you Jesus for journeying with me … For never giving up on me passing the test!  I am so blessed to get to live this dream!

Oasis – Intimate Worship…Pure Word…Real Relationships!  It is here!

Cheri

What About That Posture Now?

The Posture of a Princess

Posture! I don’t know about you but when I think about posture I see little girls dressed up like princesses walking erectly across a room with a book on their heads … Being trained to carry themselves gracefully no matter what goes on around them.

I also hear moms saying, “Sit up straight!”; “Don’t slouch!”; “Hold those shoulders back!”; “Hold your head up!”; “Remember who you are!”; “Remember who you belong to!” Maybe you hear something like that too!

But this past week I was challenged about a different kind of posture and this has been working in my spirit. I’ve been challenged about the posture of my heart. (Thank you, Sandra Camper!) What is the posture of my heart? Have I been practicing my heart-posture so that no matter what comes my way and no matter what goes on around me I can carry myself gracefully? So I’m asking God … What do You want the posture of my heart to look like? And this is what I’m hearing…

What is your posture?

My posture must always be one of humility. I must have a humble heart in every situation and in every circumstance. Jesus showed us humility. He gave up His position. He gave up His title. He gave up what was rightfully His. He humbly hung on a cursed cross when He could have called the angels to come and rescue Him. Instead, He humbly took the insults … being made fun of … being lied about … being spit upon. Yes, He humbled Himself and became a man. He humbled Himself to the point of death. And He has called me to a life of humility: willing to give up whatever it takes in order to have the posture of humility … to be clothed in humility (Colossians 3:12 NLT).

My posture must be one of submission.  I must choose to wait only upon God and silently submit to Him; for my hope and expectation are from Him (Psalm 62:5 AMP).  Submitted not only to God … Submitted to my husband … Submitted to those God has placed in my life as friends and mentors … Submitted to those who are in authority over me … Submitted to those with whom I am in community in faith.

Like a little child…

My posture must be one of absolute trust: choosing to trust my God even when everything around me is screaming that I can’t trust Him.  I must choose to trust God from the bottom of my heart and stop trying to figure out everything on my own. Instead, I must listen closely for God’s voice in everything I do and everywhere I go.  He is the one who will keep me on track (Proverbs 3:5-6 MSG). Choosing to trust people even though trusting people in the past has caused pain and loss. Choosing not to build walls of mistrust.

My posture must be one of forgiveness … Forgiving so I can receive forgiveness … Forgiveness so I can live free … Forgiveness because He calls me to live forgiving … Forgiveness because I am not perfect and instead, am in need of forgiveness.

My posture must be one of mercy and grace: mercy because of the mercy I receive … NOT getting what I deserve. Grace because of the amazing grace I receive … Getting what I DON’T deserve … Living a life that emanates grace and mercy to those in my life and to those whom God causes to bump into me in life.

My posture must be one of confidence. Not confidence in myself because I have it all together … ’cause I don’t! But confidence in my God: confidence that He has my back … Confidence that whatever He brings into my life or allows in my life He is working it in me and through me for my best … Confidence that He can and will take the good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, the joyful, the painful and mix them all together and work them for my best … Confidence that my God who began the good work in me is still working and will keep working to complete me … Confidence that He is keeping me in His completion process.  I LOVE how Paul says it, “And I am convinced and sure of this very thing, that He Who began a good work in you will continue until the day of Jesus Christ [right up to the time of His return], developing that good work and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you.” (Philippians 1:6 AMP) (Side Note for those who follow my posts or teachings … This is one of my most favorite scriptures!). He is completing me … and the posture of my heart is part of the process.

My posture must be one of purity: being quick to see my sin … being quick to see my impurity … and being quick to truly repent … experiencing Godly sorrow and then turning away from my sin and toward God’s way … bringing every thought captive to the truth of God’s Word in order to maintain a pure heart before God and toward others.

My posture must be one of longing: longing after God … Longing to have His Word etched upon my heart … Longing to honor Him with my life … Longing to be in His Presence … and then knowing that I must have Him to survive.   My heart so connects with this verse, “As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God.” Psalm 42:1 NLT. God I can’t do this without You!  I’ve gotta have You in my life!

My posture must be one of teachability: knowing I always need to be learning and growing … Knowing the most important thing is to get wisdom: His Wisdom … And not just to get that wisdom but to use that wisdom He gives in all of life’s situations.

My posture must be one of honesty: honest before God regarding my decisions and the attitudes of my heart … Honesty before others: taking off the mask … Being real and vulnerable … Honest with others even when it is difficult.

This posture is a matter of my heart. Therefore, above all things I must guard my heart. I must be very discerning of what I allow to penetrate my heart because the issues, the things of life, flow from my heart. (Proverbs 4:23 NLT)

At His Feet…

So, how do I get this posture? And when I get it, how do I keep it? It only comes from spending time with Jesus: spending time in His Presence, at His feet. He will train us and give us everything we need to carry ourselves gracefully in all aspects of life. But this only comes from time spent in His Presence. We must make such time in His Presence THE priority in life. Everything else and everyone else will be affected by the choice we make to spend time with Jesus.  This verse says it so well, “Seek the Lord, and crave Him and His strength; seek and require His face and His presence continually, always.” Psalm 105:4.  Seek The Lord.  Crave Him!  Seek and require His face and His Presence!

And all the while I can hear Him saying, “Sit up straight Cheri!”, “Don’t slouch!”, “Hold those shoulders back!”, “Hold your head up!”, “Remember who you are!”, “Remember who you belong to!”.  Maybe you hear that too!

Practicing my heart-posture so that no matter what comes my way and no matter what goes on around me I can carry myself gracefully!

Seeking After Him

Seeking and Requiring His Presence,

Cheri